Dear Granny Panties,

Dear Granny Panties,

Thank you for covering my, uh, real estate when an unexpected gust of wind lifted my skirt all the way up my back.  Your vast expanse of fabric kept me from experiencing yet another humiliating underwear incident.  I am profusely grateful, as are the other people walking into the grocery store at that precise moment.

Love,

Alicia

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